


Dowsing

by bricksandbones



Category: No Fandom, Original Work
Genre: Other, Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-11
Updated: 2016-09-11
Packaged: 2018-08-14 10:31:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8010187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bricksandbones/pseuds/bricksandbones





	Dowsing

you cut your wrist open and stare in dismay at the trickle  
like water mixed with crimson poster paint.  
you dowse for your pulse with a knife’s edge so  
the beating of your heart will be your own undoing; your  
own, the only thing you own.

you do not even own the bed you lie on or the scissors you cut your dressings with  
or the razor you cradle like a baby in the crook of your arm  
after  
but you can own your life-blood and  
you can own your pulse.  
you can own death. 

your cat smells something different about you these days.  
you hold her in your arms too so she doesn’t see   
(but cats don’t worry).   
“I know,” you tell her, “your life is tragic,” and don’t say that  
maybe it kind of is because maybe  
you don’t love her enough.


End file.
